Dear Dad,
I know I don't call you 'Dad' very often and I don't want to sound superficial on the net but there's something very pleasant about saying 'dear dad'. -it might just be the alliteration but bear with me. This May, you've finally been accredited your silver jubilee as you turn 50, so Happy Birthday! You were barely thirty when I came along and now, eighteen years later, I can proudly say you're old. Ha ha ha, kidding. Here's a few things I wanted to tell you, but couldn't really trust you'd remember what I was saying so I'll just put them into (a series of 0 and 1s-like) words.
With these fifty years, the amount of hardships you've faced, the wealth of knowledge you've acquired, the connections and the quotes have made you such a unique individual, nobody ever seems to get enough of you. Perhaps that's why you've always been that one champion fighter in my life and the encouraging one who stood by me in whatever earth-shattering problem I came home with. The short but frequent walks we take and our casual after dinner conversations atune me to the oft-forgotten fact that you are and always will be there for me to the best of your abilities and that simple assurance truly means the world to me.
I know you never quite got to do the parenting thing with us when we were little and so you've never actually been able to be a father the way non-mariners do and I don't think I've actually acknowledged these compromises you've had to make for us. Those eight to eighteen months straight that you would go without either of us seeing you at all left us as complete strangers to the other for way to long. And thus, as much as I wish I could say that was okay, and that things wouldn't be any different if you weren't in the shipping industry, I can't. But at the very least, I realised all you had to lose out on and all you've done to bridge that gap and for that, all I can say is thank you.
Now, just because there is so much we love about you, that doesn't mean we can overlook all the things you shy away from, so let's just bring that into the open too. The amount of times you've overlooked family and gone against your own words has over time, been very, very damaging to your being. Just because you are busy on weekdays doesn't mean you over-exercise on the weekends. Just because you like to read, doesn't mean you enforce your ideals onto another being. And just because I stay rooted at my study table, doesn't mean I am studying. The world isn't as black and white as you seem to make it out to be. Every child needs a strong role model in the form of parents because you and Mom are the two adults who most mould me and make me the person I have become. I've realised how much I emulate the two of you and and I'm not very proud of some of the things I've taken up from you two. Now, the baton has been passed over to me to take responsibility for what I do, but that doesn't mean you slack yourself and ignore the high standards you once set yourself to. So, do the things you love, re-evaluate your priorities every once in a while and let us know where we fall in your grand scheme of things.
The previous paragraph may seem a little harsh but don't worry, it's not like you have done nothing right. The kind of relationship you share with Mom has been one which has shown me so much about thinking beyond the needs of oneself. As an emancipated woman of the 21st century, it is often difficult for me to understand why two people would ever what to come together and live a life together when they have enough to deal with themselves. I can only hazard a guess on why anyone would want to shoulder the burdens of another and at one point in time, I didn't even believe you and Mom loved each other. Now I realise the fact that love is not everything and it doesn't always last, but seeing the bond you and Mom share, I've slowly started to see otherwise. I mean, the praise she has for you when you're not listening and the deep dependence you have on her have pretty much made you two an unbreakable unit who truly do your best to be there for one another. Hopefully, one day, I'll also be with someone I can wholeheartedly depend on and learning from your mistakes, do better than you've managed to.
All in all, I don't even know if I really want you to read this but I needed to thank you for every single thing you've done for me, tangible and intangible. And I guess what I'm really trying to say, though I don't say it very often, is that I love you. So, keep learning and keep growing the way you tell me to.
Love,
Ashi
I know I don't call you 'Dad' very often and I don't want to sound superficial on the net but there's something very pleasant about saying 'dear dad'. -it might just be the alliteration but bear with me. This May, you've finally been accredited your silver jubilee as you turn 50, so Happy Birthday! You were barely thirty when I came along and now, eighteen years later, I can proudly say you're old. Ha ha ha, kidding. Here's a few things I wanted to tell you, but couldn't really trust you'd remember what I was saying so I'll just put them into (a series of 0 and 1s-like) words.
With these fifty years, the amount of hardships you've faced, the wealth of knowledge you've acquired, the connections and the quotes have made you such a unique individual, nobody ever seems to get enough of you. Perhaps that's why you've always been that one champion fighter in my life and the encouraging one who stood by me in whatever earth-shattering problem I came home with. The short but frequent walks we take and our casual after dinner conversations atune me to the oft-forgotten fact that you are and always will be there for me to the best of your abilities and that simple assurance truly means the world to me.
I know you never quite got to do the parenting thing with us when we were little and so you've never actually been able to be a father the way non-mariners do and I don't think I've actually acknowledged these compromises you've had to make for us. Those eight to eighteen months straight that you would go without either of us seeing you at all left us as complete strangers to the other for way to long. And thus, as much as I wish I could say that was okay, and that things wouldn't be any different if you weren't in the shipping industry, I can't. But at the very least, I realised all you had to lose out on and all you've done to bridge that gap and for that, all I can say is thank you.
Now, just because there is so much we love about you, that doesn't mean we can overlook all the things you shy away from, so let's just bring that into the open too. The amount of times you've overlooked family and gone against your own words has over time, been very, very damaging to your being. Just because you are busy on weekdays doesn't mean you over-exercise on the weekends. Just because you like to read, doesn't mean you enforce your ideals onto another being. And just because I stay rooted at my study table, doesn't mean I am studying. The world isn't as black and white as you seem to make it out to be. Every child needs a strong role model in the form of parents because you and Mom are the two adults who most mould me and make me the person I have become. I've realised how much I emulate the two of you and and I'm not very proud of some of the things I've taken up from you two. Now, the baton has been passed over to me to take responsibility for what I do, but that doesn't mean you slack yourself and ignore the high standards you once set yourself to. So, do the things you love, re-evaluate your priorities every once in a while and let us know where we fall in your grand scheme of things.
The previous paragraph may seem a little harsh but don't worry, it's not like you have done nothing right. The kind of relationship you share with Mom has been one which has shown me so much about thinking beyond the needs of oneself. As an emancipated woman of the 21st century, it is often difficult for me to understand why two people would ever what to come together and live a life together when they have enough to deal with themselves. I can only hazard a guess on why anyone would want to shoulder the burdens of another and at one point in time, I didn't even believe you and Mom loved each other. Now I realise the fact that love is not everything and it doesn't always last, but seeing the bond you and Mom share, I've slowly started to see otherwise. I mean, the praise she has for you when you're not listening and the deep dependence you have on her have pretty much made you two an unbreakable unit who truly do your best to be there for one another. Hopefully, one day, I'll also be with someone I can wholeheartedly depend on and learning from your mistakes, do better than you've managed to.
All in all, I don't even know if I really want you to read this but I needed to thank you for every single thing you've done for me, tangible and intangible. And I guess what I'm really trying to say, though I don't say it very often, is that I love you. So, keep learning and keep growing the way you tell me to.
Love,
Ashi
